Here, Alex starts by asking the children what kind of team they think they are. It sounds simple, but it’s so important - kids should join a team where the values actually mean something to them. Especially when they’re young, belonging should come before score lines. In a child-first, rights-led environment, young people get to shape their own experience, from how they play to how they learn together. Winning does matter, but how they win and lose matters even more. Great coaching isn’t about telling kids what to do; it’s about listening, inviting their ideas, and acting on them so the team grows from the ground up.

Our approach in practice using the pillars

• Voice:   Listen first. Children co‑frame sessions, adapt rules, and share what works for them.
• Choice: Offer meaningful options, challenge levels, roles and equipment - so every child has agency.
• Journey: Value and celebrate progress, joy and confidence over results, reflect together on next steps.

This is a rights‑led team

In practice, children help set goals and adjust activities as they go. Coaches ask guiding questions, give choices, and keep the games moving with quick check-ins. Each session ends with a short reflection on what to try next time.

Aim to listen first, then based on their ideas, build the session with your players so they have a real voice, real choices, and ownership of their journey. That’s how belonging grows, and performance follows. 

Let's recap the session! 

• What values resonate with the children and young people in your club? Ask them and lead with it! 
• Lead with questions that helps them think. In doing so, you're giving them the chance to reflect and improve but also giving them the space to be comfortable with their voice. It's a confidence builder! 

Part One and Two: Child-First Coaching in Real Life with the Liphook Spiders | Using Voice and Choice to Define a Child-Rights Team

Part Three,  Four and Five: Child-First Coaching in Real Life with the Liphook Spiders | Great Coaches Don’t Give Answers - They Unlock Them.

In these three clips, we see voice and choice in action. However, a misconception at times is when you lead with a child’s voice, when as a coach are you able to have your own voice? Reframe that, the real challenge for a coach is to guide without taking over. As Liz mentioned, it's also a children's rights to be given information. So Instead of giving answers, shift your role to asking thoughtful questions - like how Alex demonstrates, “What did you notice that helped the ball get there?” or  “What could you try next?”.   These prompts help players reflect, notice, and make their own decisions in a safe, positive environment.

Guide, don't direct

Sessions are shaped with the children, not for them. Together, you build activities and plans that can change as new ideas come up, keeping things flexible and letting curiosity lead. By creating the right environment and setting playful challenges, coaches help children grow as leaders and teammates, not just as players. When children help shape the session, they learn to shape their choices - on the pitch and beyond.

Let's recap the session! 

• Provide them questions that help them think, guide them to the answer, that fuels their voice! The best players are made through the right guidance instead of just telling them what to do. 
• Put yourself in their shoes, level with their experience! It's good to reflect and see their perspective on each journey.
• Eventually, you'll create a space where children will thrive and have the confidence to speak and articulate their thoughts. It won't just reflect on the pitch but beyond!